An Interview with Colin Reuter - Part 1.
One of the first people I found when I started searching out cyclocross personalities on Twitter was Colin Reuter, aka: @resultsboy.
I liked him immediately, not only because he carried that arrogant sense of sarcastic humor so many cyclists seem to have, but also because of what appeared to be an active involvement in the local cyclocross scene.
As is often my mistake, I assumed because I used to race bikes 10 years ago, I would automatically be received into this tight-knit community that is New England Cycling…but as @resultsboy quickly let me know, I had to earn some respect, regardless of my past.
After this Twitter persona I had never met offered to loan me his cyclocross bike for a race (I had been trying on a 1993 steel Kona MTB), I told him of my desire to get the hole shot, even though I was starting 110th in the Warwick Cat 4 Race. His response was quick and to the point: “Don’t be the guy that hasn’t raced in 15 years who goes to the front and fucks up everyone’s race on his way to the back.” I went for the hole shot anyway, but I appreciated his candor.
Now, one year later, Colin has proven that he is, in fact, as heavily involved in the local cyclocross scene as I had thought, if not more. I had the chance to waste almost 90 minutes interviewing Colin last week on a cold, rainy August evening. I then spent over three hours editing down the interview because he wouldn’t stop going on and on about himself…and even after all the editing, I still had to break the interview into three parts.
You should note this interview was conducted over Google Chat, per Mr. Reuter’s request.
I give you Part 1:
colin.reuter: Yo, welcome to the internet.
me: Ah…This is amazing!
colin.reuter: 2010. We can chat…in a browser.
me: So…Lots of shit going on for you right now, eh?
colin.reuter: It’s insane; insanely awesome, but still insane. I’m trying to create the crossresults.com team site as we speak, but I promise you will get at least 51% of my attention…I’m full of caffeine, let’s do this.
me: So I was talking with Tim Johnson the other day and he kept saying how big your brain is. Do you think you’re smart?
colin.reuter: I’m wicked smaht, guy. Smaht enough to realize that you’re already setting me up to look like a dick.
me: Not at all. I just want to get a good feel of who Colin Reuter is. Self confidence, or lack thereof, says a lot about a person.
colin.reuter: I like how you immediately name dropped Tim Johnson. That’s always a good idea.
me: Don’t try to take control of this interview.
colin.reuter: One time, Tim lapped me, and slapped me on the ass.
me: You’ve become famous on the Internet for you Seat Cam and Bar Cam footage. Do you have video of that slap?
colin.reuter: My single, greatest failure in Seat Cam history is not having footage of that.
me: Well, from what I hear you’ll have many more opportunities to film it again.
colin.reuter: Oh please. I’m easily 0.5% faster this year than last.
me: Getting back to Tim Johnson…He said you guys are working on something together and that this would be a good place to discuss it. Please share.
colin.reuter: Is this whole interview a ruse to try to find out what Tim and I are working on??? Because it almost worked. But no, I cannot tell you anything.
me: You’re awfully defensive. Are you sure that’s caffeine and not cocaine in your system? Are you a big drug user?
colin.reuter: I’ve never tested positive.
me: How old are you, again?
colin.reuter: 28.
me: Do you ever feel like you’re not accomplishing much? Do you ever get disappointed in yourself?
colin.reuter: Dude, I have a website. That’s all the accomplishment a dork needs. But yeah, I think my chance at a pro cycling career has probably come and gone.
me: I turned 33 this year and there’s definitely an additional sense of not having done shit as you get older. How old’s your girlfriend?
colin.reuter: She’s 26, so she still has all kinds of time to get her shit together. Wait, so basically you just realized that your greatest accomplishment in 33 years is this interview? I’m sorry, man.
me: Well what the fuck is your greatest accomplishment?
colin.reuter: Popularizing the usage of the word “nemesis” in New England cyclocross. Huh… so I guess we tied on that one.
me: No, mine is marrying and staying married to my wife. Which begs the question: how are you not engaged to that lovely lady right now? Are you two living together?
colin.reuter: In sin. It’s glorious.
me: Is she legal?
colin.reuter: Legal? In age or citizenship? Nevermind, the answer is yes.
{for clarification, it was a question of citizenship, as Colin’s girlfriend is from a small country near, but not quite as fun as, Australia}
me: You’re barely legal, as far as I’m concerned, being from Maine. Where did you go to college?
colin.reuter: This interview is actually more perverse than I expected, well done. I went to Cornell.
me: It’s cold up there, eh? What did you study?
colin.reuter: Not as cold as Maine, but it’s colder than Boston. I studied computer science, in case you couldn’t guess from my INTERNET ADDICTION.
me: Let’s talk about cyclocross. This interview is pretty boring so far.
colin.reuter: You’re in charge, buddy.
me: I know, I know. Twitter is crazy, right?
colin.reuter: Twitter is so stupid and yet so useful.
me: Enough Twitter talk, let’s talk cyclocross. When and why did you start racing cyclocross?
…waiting
Keep it simple.
…more waiting
I can tell you just deleted a bunch of text.
colin.reuter: I started racing cyclocross in the fall of 2006. I had just fled a horrible job in Orlando and started mountain bike racing again. Everyone was like, “Hey, are you gonna race cross?” So I was like… well shit… yes? I like how you finally asked me something open ended and then told me not to write much.
me: That’s how I interview. Honestly, you mentioned your realization that a pro gig isn’t too realistic at this point, so what goal(s) do you have in the sport.
colin.reuter: My lifetime goal is to get a UCI point.
me: You serious?
colin.reuter: Yes? Preferably without seeking out a weak field to do it in.
me: Is that a lot harder than getting 8th in a Cat 3/4 race?
colin.reuter: No, UCI points go 10 deep, so it’s probably easier. My best finish last year was 17th. But the field gets faster every year, and like you said, I’m pretty much over the hill.
me: If you were a woman, this would be your sexual prime.
colin.reuter: “If?”
1 year ago - read more...
